Anna: It's hard for your brother not to be on edge when he's with gay men. There's trauma now that follows him everywhere. If you sense that he's feeling down or he has this anger inside of him because something like that happened to him, just give him some air to breathe first. Then take his mind off of things. Talk about your day, ask about his, eat some good food, watch a movie together. Now, about his homophobia, again, I can't blame him. This is practically like how women feel when they get sexually assaulted and they try to avoid men as much as possible, even to the point where they just absolutely hate the gender. But he shouldn't generalize. I think it will take a lot of time and convincing before he can remove this stereotype that gay men are really thirsty. For now, I think he should learn how to stop the sexual assault. If he's in a public area, he can shout and people will start to notice the molester, thus making him nervous. If he's in work, he should report to the higher ups about this. Again, I understand why you're brother is homophobic, but I'm not saying that it's okay to be homophobic. It's just that this is reality, that homosexual men can be as predatory as any other molester.
"Is it bad that I'm sort of addicted to Tinder? I don't actually meet up with anyone but I just resort to swiping right and left (but mostly left) whenever I have time because I'm just so bored. Is it also bad that when someone asks me what's up I have to hide the truth that oh i'm on tinder nothing much lol?"
Anna: I don't think it's bad that you're "addicted' to Tinder. You probably used the word addicted because you feel really ashamed about it, so it looks like a bigger problem than it actually is. It's not. You don't do anything harmful to anyone or yourself. I mean it's just swiping left and right and occasionally talking to people. You're only putting yourself at risk when you decide to meet up or give certain information about yourself. But all in all, Tinder is a pretty safe dating app (how you only talk to people that have mutually swiped right and how easy it is to unmatch those conversations if it becomes toxic). And it's not like you're desperate for love or whatever. It's for fun, clean fun. So don't be ashamed about it.
Ana: I don't think it's bad that you're addicted to Tinder. There's nothing bad about it. I guess as long as you're aware of internet safety and all that especially since it's strangers that are on there. You know, online stranger danger. If you're not doing anything bad, then there's nothing bad about it